Love Story Reflection

As goofy as my grandparents are, I really admire their marriage. Much of my childhood was spent listening to their crazy stories about escapades in the Poconos, the Jersey Shore, and the movie theaters of Germantown. Over the years, I have developed deep respect for my grandparents' strong relationship and I hope someday to be able to have the same relationship with a boyfriend or husband.
My grandparents have taught me many things through their relationship, but what has always struck me is their humor, their support and their family values. As heard in the recordings, my grandfather especially always has a quick quip for whatever my grandfather says. He is always joking, and my grandmother is always laughing with him, even at the jokes that at this point in my career as his granddaughter, I have heard upwards of 20 times. I think the fact that my grandparents can laugh together exhibits what a strong relationship they have because of course life has not always been kind to them. However, they have always supported each other. They both grew up in very poor families in Germantown, Philadelphia. My grandfather, like most of his older siblings, was determined to make it out of Germantown, to make a better life for himself. He enrolled at La Salle University to get his bachelor's degree and my grandmother worked crazy hours to help pay for it. In 1980, my grandfather finally earned his MBA, and started to make his way in the world of banking and finance. I have always appreciated my grandmother in how supportive she was of my grandfather, even when it meant she had to work copiously as well as care for my mom and her siblings. Finally, I love how involved my grandparents are with the family. From a young age, my grandparents have imbued in me a deep sense of commitment to family. My grandmother mentioned how she has become the adoptive sister of my grandfather's sisters. I specifically asked her to talk about that facet of her relationship with my grandfather through his family because it has been so important to my childhood and it is something I want to emulate with my future significant other. I grew up very close to my great-aunts. In the same way that my grandmother is their sister, I am their granddaughter. My third cousin, Sarah, is actually one of my best friends and closest relatives because our grandmother's are best friends and our moms are best friends. I think that is not something many other families experience. If I ever have children or a husband, I want to follow my grandparents' example.
I love my grandparents and they have been such an integral part of my life as role models and their marriage inspires me.

Some say love...

One of my favorite love songs is "Home" by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros. The chorus of the song says, "Home, let me go home, home is wherever I'm with you." I find that sentiment really heart-warming because it is so simple. Love is about being at home. Another one of my favorite songs says, "You're already home where you feel loved." That concept of being at home, of being comfortable and stable is really appealing to me. Home is what I look for in a relationship. In Lord Huron's "Time to Run," the narrator talks about love and relationships becoming intrinsic parts of you. Love is indelible - no one can take it from you, "I wanted everyone to know you're the girl for me/ I wanted everybody else in the world to know it/That I ain't ever gonna' let 'em take the life from me." I like the idea that your love with a person is unique to just the two of you and it is something that belongs entirely to you both. I think that is really powerful because the same cannot be said for much else in this world.
"You Can Call Me Al" is probably not considered by most as one of Paul Simon's love songs, but it is one of my favorites. Although it has a very upbeat pop melody, its lyrics are saturated with the anxieties and loneliness every person feels at some point. The song basically depicts a man who feels completely desolate and seeks companionship as inspiration. Love is his role model. Maybe it is not necessarily love in a romantic way either, but a love in friendship. He says, "If you be my bodyguard, I can be your long lost pal/And Betty when you call me, you can call me Al." I think we so often focus on the idea of soul-mates as romantic partners, but I do not believe that. First of all, I think there are many people in this large world with whom you are potentially compatible, and I believe there are different points in life at which different relationships (platonic or romantic) satisfy our needs somehow. My best friend, I think, could be one of my soul-mates. We have been best friends for 10 years, and for 7 of those years we have not lived near each other or gone to school together, but she is the person I am currently closest with in my life. I can share anything with her and her likewise. Our relationship is like that of Betty and Al's. We just work together; we support each other.
Finally, I think that while emotional intimacy is important to romantic relationships, we overlook the little things like being able to laugh together. Sinead O'Connor sings in her song "The Wolf is Getting Married" that, "you're smile makes me smile/you're joy gives me joy/you're hope gives me hope." I think humor and laughter in a relationship is so important. I think it is sweeter when my grandparents laugh together than when they show any other sign of affection. Someday, I hope to have a long term committed relationship, perhaps decades long as my grandparents' and still be able to laugh with my partner.

Miss Representation

I find it very distressing that girls are sexualized and objectified at such early ages. It worries me because my own sister is only nine years old and often times I hear her make comments about how she is too muscular and not skinny enough. It makes me sick to hear her say these things. One of my mom's friends has always told me that strong is beautiful, but clearly that is not what is being taught to my young impressionable sister. In the first place, my sister has a rebellious personality, so I worry that that coupled with any insecurity could lead her somewhere terrifying (dressing inappropriately and behaving inappropriately).
Personally, I have always dressed on the modest side, but I do not judge those who prefer to dress more  liberally. I think that sometimes we, society, accuse girls of dressing too revealingly or provocatively and this takes the burden of responsibility off of men. Of course, men are being raised in a society where media says it is okay to objectify a woman's body, but this should not exempt them from treating women like fellow human beings. Men need to know that just because a woman is dressed a certain way does not mean she is asking for anything and it is unfair and frankly disgusting for them to expect something of it. Historically, in these instances, women have always been the ones who should "know better" and men just "cannot help it." I think that notion is ridiculous and needs to change. I should not have to worry about what my sister wears for fear that her vulnerability will be abused by a presumptuous young boy.
Finally, I want to look forward to a world where my sister and I (and all women) will not face such degradation and sexism. I had never really thought that my gender would play a prominent role in my career, but since watching Miss Representation, I admit that I am slightly concerned. At the Mount, students have always been encouraged to be women of "courage and conviction," to speak up and out for what we believe in. It scares me to think that I may be entering the world where that is not always the case, and I naively ask myself why that is. More importantly, I want to help stop the discrimination, the objectification, the sexualization.